Beauty-full

This is my personal blog, so I have decided to blog about one of the most overused words, Beauty.
At this particular moment I have been pondering beauty much, I am a VERY VERY aesthetic person. Where other people see material, I see the delicate weave of fabric, I cannot resist touching things when I see them, I turn into a child at bright colors, yarn, paints etc. I can see the beauty in things broken down, used and abused. A bohemian abode catches the corner of my eye to the point where I can smell the patchouli or incense coiling itself and rising to the beat of French accordion or tribal drums, a poet passionately reading a piece of prose....Yes those things are esoterically beautiful to me, but what I want to write about is, What is beauty as far as human beings go? When I grew up, I was so so hard on myself, Girls at a certain age usually try to measure up to what they see in movies and on magazine covers, they see their own mothers insecurities and watch them get operated on to have bigger breasts, or a smaller nose, the list goes on and on and on. The standard of beauty changes from country to country and culture to culture ages old genetic codes even have a play in this. I have been married to Jorge for 12 years this year, and he has always seen me as beautiful, no matter what stage of life that I have been in, I have gained weight and I have lost weight, I have had short hair and long hair. Obviously I have always had a VERY specific body shape. I have always had a booty, one of my friends asked how I got it like that, wow, like there was something I actually did to get it like that. When I moved to Chile, I feel somewhat comfortable here as far as being beautiful the standard here fluctuates very little, Long hair, curvy body, little clothing and if you have blue eyes and blond hair you get like triple brownie points. One time Moriah and I were talking about boys whistling here at girls and men at women, she was like "Mom, If someone says they don't like getting whistled at here they have never been whistled at." HAH leave it to my kids to tell the truth, you may not feel that way but my little boys still whistle at me when I dress up and it makes me smile, Jorge on the other hand is Mr. Grabby hands. But I have never met anyone I did not think was beautiful until they opened their mouth, the thing that gets me everytime is I really genuinely love people when I meet them and then they can start being rude and hateful, biased, controlling etc. etc. and then the beauty just fades away..Sometimes I think that people think if you are a Christian woman you don't have to be beautiful. I myself, prefer a rugged natural beauty, I loved aged wrinkles and smile lines on people ESPECIALLY if they are genuine and wear them well, I love how beautiful the women are in Chile, especially the artists up in the Cajon or the musicians that bustle along Plaza Italia, The men that wear their hair down to the middle of the back. I think of how God made the lilies, pansies, bright extravagant sea creatures. I think of Esther in the bible in her beautification process. I think of Abrahams wife Sarah, how she was so beautiful that Abraham lied to protect HIS self. But the most extravagant beauty of all is what we carry on the inside, how we view God, How we view others, because how we view others shapes the entire world and its outcome, it shapes how our children see other and their relationships. Yes inner beauty is more important than outer beauty but where would we be without beauty and the word-beautiful...Well, I heard Pat Robertson say one time that maybe if a woman took care of herself better than maybe her husband wouldn't be over-indulging in video games...OH Pat Robertson it just sounds like you don't know what true beauty is and maybe you surround yourself with ugly people, what I mean is ugly on the inside. The closer to God I get the more beautiful I feel by my surrender, yes I still dress up but, now as opposed to my teen years I know that I am beautiful and I am thankful that Jorge obviously thinks I am beautiful and I am growing on the inside and my outside is a reflection of that growth, not merely a desperate pursuit to cover up a deep insecurity issue....Well, enough of my ramblings on beauty. What do you find beautiful? Physically? Mentally? Emotionally?
Comment and we can chat it out, or add more insight ;]

Let's get REAL please......

So, given the places that I have lived, ad the people that I have met, it seems to me that some of the most divisive, ungraceful, and unhappy people that I have met are *gulp* "christians". Yep, I said it. I am not in any way implying that with anger or hate or bitterness, I'm just being brutally honest. before you freak out and click the little x, you might want to finish the blog first ;).
It's like we first start out in Christ with this precious gift of salvation knowing that we are redeemed, forgiven, loved, and accepted, just like that. We are not the same yet we are still growing in grace, but along the way in our walk we pick up burdens instead of letting Christ carry them for us. We get stuck on petty and ridiculous things that halt our fellowship, growth, and outreach (among other things). For example; One family sends their children to public school, while another family homeschools, one woman wears makeup and short hair, while another decides that long hair, and no makeup is the way to go, one person uses a guitar and djembe in the worship while another chooses hymns. One family eats processed food while another eats only raw and organic. These things are NOT the gospel and are subject to change. By the way do you think that either form of worship is less pleasing to God?? Well, it can be if it is done with a prideful spirit. Somewhere along the way, these personal preferences become doctorine , and salvation is lost among mans mindset. People in the body of Christ start looking at each other with disgust and pride in their hearts and do not like being around each other. Suddenly everything in the world is an enemy. The government is the enemy, immigrants are the enemy, homosexuals are the enemy, large corporations are the enemy, and the list goes on and on and on (nothing new here for thousands of years). Unfortunatey WE are the enemy. Our hearts and thoughts and sin is the enemy! We are stinking up the church and the world by placing the focus on everything but our own rotting sin. We are singlehandedly tainting the purity of the church. The worst part of this is that the world can see a liar a mile away, especially with a big fake smile and a nice suit and tie, a hearty handshake while we act ultra holy and superior as we pick each other apart one bloody piece at a time. The whole time that we think we are doing God a favor by being his beacon of awesomeness to the world, there are still people lost, hurting, and dying waiting for someone who has a something that they have never seen before, someone who has a joy, a peace, and a hope, when the world is falling down around them. They need that person to tell them why they have joy, and peace, and hope..Hopeless people need HOPE, not an unacheivable set of rules. Poor people need to know that our God came to this earth in a body yet desired no fame, or money, or things or fancy ministry, he came to serve not to be served. Sick people need to know that they are not sick because they did not have enough faith. The world always tells us that our worth is found in who we are, what we become, and what we can acheive (well if that's true, most of the world is crap outta luck). The focus ends up being continually on the outside, not the inside out. This "self" sickness has quietly creeped into churches all over and is insideuosly ruining God's plan for us. We need salvation. We are all sinners and there is no way around that. If you think you are a "good" person, that's great but there are over 631 laws in the bible so I think you may have broken at least one...If you haven't, I'm sure that there is someone out there that thinks you are a royal jackass (welcome to my world). You need forgiveness and restoration to your creator. I don't have a ton of time but I have provided a link that explains the process quite thoroughly.http://carm.org/what-is-salvation Please comment with any questions, I will do my darndest and best to answer or Im sure that one of my amazing frinds can chime in with a scriptural answer as well.
Lots of Love from Chile,
Sarai

Fertile soil, sifting the dirt.

So I have this really cool system in my backyard for changing my organic waste into dark, rich, soil..... I have little miniature piles of dirt all over my backyard and when I come home from the Feria (Open air street market) and cook some yummy foods, I end up with like a pile of waste like stems, yicky apple parts, etc. so I just toss it on the back in a pile and cover it up, then after a month of rain, and, sun, and air I sift the piles with a rake and move them to another part of the yard, voila! at the middle or bottom of the pile is the darkest richest most perfect soil that you have ever seen! Oh how it makes me smile.....I dont want to put grass in the yard, and I have these great intentions of growing some amazing things very soon. If you really know Sarai, you know that I am pretty serious about the environment, and since I came to Chile I may even fall into borderline, diehard. Unfortunately I have to hear a certain political groups sometimes deny global warming, even making decisions that affect God's incredibly breathtaking, life sustaining, creation. Every time that I open the bible I see Jesus teaching a lesson that somehow involves his creation and since the climate In Israel was very similar to the climate in Chile.....I get that :) I love how Jesus's first miracle was turning water into wine for a wedding feast. I love that when he wants us to turn from our laziness, he asks us to consider the Ant. I love that the "locusts" that John ate with honey, was actually carob pods. Everytime I quietly observe life around me or even watch it zip past me at incredible speeds, I see a lesson from my Savior, but I see that sometimes views with how we were raised interfere with things God wants to teach us by observing his creation. I realized today raking all of my little compost heaps, that I must let the trash in my life be transformed by grace, and tribulation, and rain, into a fertile soil that gets spread around to help other people grow. And I am begging you, the things around us that God has created are very precious, and if you love him you love his creation as well, PLEASE take care of it and consider that when he made it, he said that it was good, and we do not treat good things poorly.
Scriptures on God's beautiful and educational creation can be found here; explore your own bible as well!
http://www.webofcreation.org/Manuals/scheidt/scripture.html

Happy Monday.

Well Happy Monday morning to all of my wonderfully unique friends and family, I feel so blessed today just to have the sun shine on my face and bring my kids to school,(even if we were packed into the metro like sardines in a can). Today we awoke at about 5:30 a.m. but both Emmanuel and I could not sleep because we were so excited (like the night before Christmas) I met some really nice women today that alone is enough to be grateful for :). One mom in particular was from Australia so she had a beautiful accent, I met two of her five kids, her daughter Adelaide, and her son Charlie. Charlie was a baby so because of my idiotic lack of discretion I made a Charlie bit my finger joke, and said "I bet you get that alot" and of course as politely and gracefully as she could, she said, "yes I do". Oh gosh when do I think before I speak? Anyway I am making quick friends as usual since to me I make friends with almost anyone around me (that's just who I am) I love people that I haven't even met yet. My "nephew" Mason and I are also starting an eco- tour business on the side. and with both of our personalities it should be super fun. I am gaining my bearings around me again and I just wanted to personally say that there are SO MANY of you that I miss so much. I LOVE YOU! Enjoy this monday with your family.

Hittin the streets with my two feet.

Hello from the foot of the Andes! Aside from being a perfectly mild winter, the nights are still especially cold in my little concrete piece of paradise, so red wine and walks are keeping me unchilled , (now I know why wine is so huge here)...Moving on, the kids start a christian school on Monday and they look so adorably adult in their little uniforms, yes we had them in a liberal arts school which would have been freaking awesome if they were actually learning anything besides very colorful words *wink* *wink*, so a friend we met kind of plugged us into a perfect school. I will be helping at Santiago Christian Academy two days per week, thoughts are running through my head though, like what if they let me help then notice I have several tattoos and decide I am not ok anymore? What if they don't take the time to become a friend? What if they see this blog?! lol... Yes, I am a tidbit nervous due to the fact that I am incredibly in love with Jesus, seriously my life lies securely in his redeeming grace, but I am still nervous that people will question if I am a follower of Christ. No matter, I am going to jump into this feet first and a full heart and see what lessons that both the kids and I will learn! I have been taking as much time as possible to explore the streets of Santiago and have met so many people and made so many contacts, Artists, street vendors, clothing designers, I know that my coffee meets art house will become a reality soon and I am brimming with patient anticipation (a great description). I am becoming inspired, and little by little needle felting, nuno felting, painting and more so that I build up my portfolio and walk into a gallery knowing that i could be turned away or get into a showing....Either way, although we have a little bit in this world, I am so content in Chile and love exploring, growing and playing, sheesh I sound like a five year old.

Bone Chillingly, balmy.......

So before I arrived here, I wondered what fall and winter would be like as I had received so many different answers. Jorge told me that it dipped far below 0, I did not realize that he meant celsius, so I had absolutely no idea what I should expect, but this week I have definitely been given a good idea what all of the fuss is about. Growing up in Wisconsin and Michigan I have vivid memories of brutal winters that have been forever engrained in my brain, for one thing my father (whom I love very much) was a super tightwad and didn't like to turn the heat up, so I remember catching a chill so many times that ended up with me in bed piled high with what felt like a hundred blankets. On one occasion (this is not meant for minors) I remember smoking pot with one of my friends in upper Michigan and of course when you are under the influence it feels like everything lasts for hours upon hours so you don't really realize that you are walking in freezing cold because your senses are dulled so you forget normal things like mittens or hats and I clearly remember that was a chill that I could not kick, it felt like it took two days to lose. We all know that temps in the North country are actually FREEZING! So when I grew older I realized in Utah that people used heat and didn't mind turning the thermostat past 60 in the dead of winter and I  became accustomed to a milder winter and way of life. Anyway on with the point that I am trying to make. The last week in Chile the temperature has dipped into the sixties but the evenings drop into the low 50s or high 40s, so in all aspects pretty mild, right? Wrong. Homes in Chile are built without central heat and are also built without insulation in the walls and carpet pads (I'm serious) In the evening you feel like you are freezing and actually catch a chill as the air feels dense, hazy, moist, and thick, you can smell many peoples wood burning stoves, but I have also heard stories of smelly kerosene heaters. In the morning you carry that chill with you and your home pretty much stays the same temp, so even when the chill has passed and the midday temps hit the 60s you are still kind of cold, and your brain exagerates what are pretty mild temperatures and you hear yourself tell your kids to bundle up or they will catch a cold (I never thought I would see the day I uttered that phrase) and you have tea about 30 times a day, ok well maybe 10 times. In fact I have actually made my kids wear socks in the house......whoa. The other thing is that our hot water heater is currently broken and we have been boiling water for baths, I actually have no complaints about this because I think it builds character for our kids, also as of yet I only have a small washing machine and hang clothing out to dry every day, you may think that Id be bickering up a storm because my American rights have been violated, but actually no.....I am embracing every experience that God is leading me into and the only thing I can think about is the people down from us who are in ramshackle houses, Do they have heat!? My heart is concocting a plan so that people in the U.S can help with that issue, maybe they will, maybe they won't. What I have seen from the church has actually been thus far, disapointing to say the least, so maybe this will lead to a secular act on Jorge and my part in ministry. My opinion about living in the states has been forever changed and I see even my pride so clearly, things that I have said in the past to certain people make me shudder (especially to immigrants) I have thought that things uttered from my mouth were either helpful or otherwise, but now I just look back and realize that it was just arrogant, lopsided, and a one sided view, it makes me very sad......with that being said embrace your local immigrant families instead of picking out things that seem different or onorthodox to you or even if you think they are wrong..and wear socks so that you don't catch a cold.
With love from the mouth of the Andes,
Sarai and the Clan.